I just have one more effing dreadful day of school...I've been sitting here for 4 hours trying to magically conjure a bull essay. There's too many things running through my head.

I had a wonderful time seeing all my family and friends in Pennsylvania and New Jersey. It's absurd that TWICE already our little family reunions happened due to funerals. My dad said that Uncle Don and Rodney brought us all together in the first place. So many people were happy to see my dad. So many people said to me, "I remember seeing you when you were this big". I'm still in shock, you see, when I went to L.A., I could come home and Union City would all be the same. Union City was my rock. My dad's hometown was my second rock. I would visit once every 2-3 years and things would stay the same. The faces grew older but the memories stayed the same; I nearly forgot about death. I'm really sad that my dad lost his second father and one of the biggest parts of his childhood, but he's not sad himself. Just like when my cousin Rodney passed away he explained, "he wouldn't want your tears." Just be happy.

Being single is really weird. I've become a little reckless. I've been trying to supplement my happiness with actions that are out-of-the-ordinary. Being single is supposed to fun and a time for self-growth and awareness but I felt like I did that and more even when in a relationship. This other thing has been stifled and swept under the rug for nearly 7+ years and it still makes me feel so alive and so nervous. Everyone I care about would be involved in this; it's not something I can hide and keep to myself. Where will this go...I'll never know but for now I'll enjoy the ride. 

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